This is another review of another submission by another person. This person is a tall person called Russ. I have known this tall person Russ long enough to understand his submission in a deep and personal way. It is terrible. Look at how terrible it is.

To be fair to the tall person Russ, this was terrible before he added another layer of terrible to it. The perspective is off, somehow. And that crack. Don't get me started on that crack. Just a bad drawing all the way around.

But then came tall Russ with his puddle of piss.

The puddle itself seems realistic enough. Vaguely not-terribly-exotic-country-shaped. And I like the way the headwaters seem to flow from just beyond the edge of image. It's mysterious. Was the pisser a traditionalist? Facing the wall with a misplaced sense of modesty? Good for them. We need to have standards and we need to recognize those who abide. 15.82 points.

The trouble starts with the reflection.

When something is reflected in a puddle of urine, it appears upside down. Try it. Go pee outside. Or go pee inside. Just pee somewhere where you can see something reflected in the piss puddle. Make sure that that something has a discernible top and bottom so you can confirm piss puddles reflect things upside down.

Clearly this image in inaccurate. That leaves us with only a few options.

Option one: The bird is dead and hanging from the wire. In this case, I hope it is the same bird that pitied me four pages back.

Option two: The bird is possessed. I'm clearly no expert in the arts, dark or otherwise, so I'll dismiss this possibility out of hand.

Option three: Russ is an idiot. I think that's your winner. Back to the review.

The edges of the piss puddle are a bit darker than the center. From an aesthetic standpoint, I like this decision. It helps establish a strong visual barrier between the fresh piss puddle and the most-likely-piss-soaked-but-now-dry surrounding sidewalk. +12 points.

I'm no doctor, but based on my extensive understanding of urine and medicine, the dark piss puddle edges could portend a serious dehydration issue. Or rickets. Russ should definitely see a urologist. -12 points.

Another commendable submission. Good work tall Russ. 15.82 piss points out of a possible 18.26 piss points.